He Said That

narcissisTypically, I don’t usually give much page time to Dr. D…

Usually, I have far better things to ramble about, however, the words that fall outta his mouth sometimes are far too glorious not to share. I almost convince myself that he isn’t being serious. The thing is, he means every word. To me, it’s pure entertainment and a constant reminder of one of the best decisions I have *ever* made.

Seriously, have you ever been the hapless receiver of any of these lines?

 

“I am *extremely* talented and good looking.”

“You’re nervous around me; that’s why you’re hot. (I was sweating)”

“Don’t I look like a Super Hero?”

“You got the prime genetics with me, didn’t you?” (referring to our kids)

“You know you still want me, you just won’t admit it.” (note: he’s seriously dating a girl across the state)

“Damn, I am *so* good~looking.”

“What should I do? The babysitter wants me.”

“All these girls keep stuffing phone numbers in my pockets.”

That’s what I remember off the top of my head. There are many more… Hope ya laughed. I did and do.

The Munkees are WILD

My children, my angels, the fruit of my loins, have been maniacal lately. Enough to make me ponder my decision to be a parent. ::yellow page scan for Adoption Agencies:: (Anyone have Angelina & Brad’s number?) Goodness gracious…for serious! I am ready to pull my hair out. Constant bickering, complete disregard of any of my requests, whining, temper tantrums, backtalk…yikes. “Hello? Santa is watching, you know!” (I could save some serious cash this year proving a point: Ooops…yep…you were NAUGHTY, I told you…) The Munkees are pushing mommy over the edge…

While they sleep and as I write this, I am aware of the root of this behavior. When Dr. D. and I split, Punks was 5, Bubs 3 and Mouse 1. Young, not fully aware of what was going on, they bounced back and forth between us like pinballs. My home has been the stable one: One job, no ill-mention of the other parent, adult-issues (finances, stress, etc.) NOT spoken of in munkee presence, casual romance out of sight, daily affection, book-reading, etc. Dad’s house: plenary opposite. A train wreck for me. 2.5 years later, I am constantly “reprogramming” my munchkins.

Dr. D. is engaged. His fiancé has a 4-year old. Their relationship is unhealthy. (shocker.) The kids tell me and even SHE has told me how they argue…yet, she still wants to marry him? (Her background is a grim one…and let’s just say that this is another prime example of how insecurity/low self-esteem is a curse.) The upside: they have set their wedding date for next November, and a lot could happen between now and then. I left this relationship to spare myself and my children from a life of turmoil and [mostly verbal & emotional] abuse, yet here it is, HALF of their life again. It breaks my heart. It is this reason that I wish I were one of the single moms, whose father of her children, just walked away…

My children are acting out. They are aping the behavior they see; and while at times I feel like throwing in the towel because THIS is what I LEFT, I know these are the times I must fight the hardest. Survivor: Outwit. Outsmart. Outplay. Unfortunately for me, the court system in my county SUCKS. And when I say it sucks…it’s “*blink* are you kidding me? sucks.” ie: I always thought it was illegal and you got in *legal* trouble if you purger yourself under oath. ummm…not here. You can LIE. LIE. LIE. and wow…get away with it. *blink* *blink*

Ugh, enough about D.D. It makes my stomach churn. It’s midnight. I’m heading upstairs to snuggle with my wild munkees.